You thought you were prepared for it. Eager, even. So, now that the ink is finally dry on your divorce decree, why do you feel as if someone just gut-punched you?
You should realize that it is perfectly normal to feel as you do. Regardless of your motivations (or lack thereof) to get divorced, this is a loss that needs to be grieved just as any other does. Below are four things to do when forging a new path after divorce.
1. Discuss the transition with the kids
You should not just have one talk with your children wherein you announce the forthcoming divorce. Instead, carve out some recurring time to spend one-on-one with each child to check their inner barometer regarding their feelings about and experiences since the split.
2. Follow up with your family law attorney
If it’s been a rocky transition from married to single, you may still have some unresolved issues to put to bed. Has all property been divided/returned? Does your custody arrangement need a tweak or two? Before you close the door on your divorce, make sure that all loose ends are tied up neatly.
3. Create a single-income budget
You may have already worked this out, but it’s a good idea to review your financial picture anyway now that you are divorced. Did you remember to change the beneficiaries of your retirement pension and life insurance policies? What about updating your will? These can all be switched now that you are no longer married to your spouse.
4. Enjoy the single life
Don’t rush into another marriage or serious relationship. Enjoy being unfettered for awhile. Use this time to work on you. Get back into body-building, lose that spare tire, cut your hair. Take up ballroom dancing or sky-diving. Take yourself out on a date and treat yourself well.
Remember, too, that as time passes, you may discover that you have some post-divorce issues to manage. Custody matters frequently need to be revisited to keep up with your children’s changing needs or a parental relocation. Your Houston family law attorney can help guide your choices in the future.